Fear of Relapse
You've been through a pretty tough time with S.A.D. and finally you feel like you're getting on top of it. You've been feeling much better – pretty 'normal' in fact. You've been mindful, using your coping skills and (hopefully) been pro-active using daily practices like Mindfulness, exercise, re-focusing, and so on.
Then you wake up one morning feeling bad.
Now everyone has good and bad days, but when you've been through a bad period of S.A.D. – a day that just might seem a bit 'blagh' to someone else – feels catastrophic to you, and that question starts going through your head.
What if my Anxiety or Depression comes back?
What if I go right back to the beginning and I have to go through this all over again?
Suddenly you start to feel worse, you start to ruminate and worry – and before you know it – you're on the 'slippery slope' again.
Why?
First – your catastrophic thinking, ruminating and worrying causes stress – stress is the beginning of S.A.D. and is guaranteed to make you feel worse.
Second – this stress contributes to 'The Kindling Effect [PDF]' in which small stimuli that wouldn't normally trigger a full on episode in someone who isn't prone to S.A.D. – may do so in someone who is, because your tolerance for stress or discomfort is lower. One of the ways I would put it is you're less resilient.
What do I do about it and what do I do to avoid relapse?
Here are some suggestions that can definitely help keep you off the 'slippery slope' to relapse.
- If you do wake up feeling 'Blagh' – normalise that everyone has a 'blagh' day now and then, and just because you're having one doesn't mean you'll end up back at the beginning. Encourage yourself not to catastrophize and use helpful self-talk such as "I'm sure I'll feel better once I get going" – and then distract and re-focus on something else - "It'll pass".
- Ask yourself is there anything special about this particular day – for example is it the anniversary of something like a death or has something stressful happened in the last day or so? – have you been overdoing it? – are you tired? - did you forget to take your medication, if you're on it?
- Don't get lazy about practising your coping skills, exercise, meditation and so forth. This is your 'Emotional brushing and flossing' (as I call it), that inoculates you against S.A.D. Be pro-active. Are you sleeping well? How's your diet? (See links to my article on this below).
- Have you been under significant stress in the period leading up to how you're feeling right now? Do things to make yourself feel better – up to and including taking a 'Mental Health Day', doing quiet, gentle activities that are soothing and pleasing – if you do - take charge though, and give yourself permission to do it – don't feel pushed into it by feelings of fear and inadequacy.
- Talk to someone. Connecting with others and talking and interacting (not necessarily about your problems), is a great balm for emotional distress.
I would emphasise that some people are going to relapse whatever they do – so I'm not saying that these suggestions are guaranteed to stop it or prevent it (but remember 'It will pass').
If your one 'blagh' day turns into two or three – then seek help, but in the meantime – don't make one 'blagh' day a self-fulfilling prophecy into relapse.
Helpful links:
Diet and herbal supplements (related article)
Getting a better night's sleep (related article)
Australian Bureau of Statistics mental health report 2013
Remember these resources:
Lifeline Australia - 13 11 14
Mensline Australia - 1300 78 99 78
Beyondblue - 1300 224 636
Suicideline Victoria - 1300 651 251
Suicide Call Back Service - 1300 659 467
Kids Helpline - 1800 551 800